Pregnancy is a very personal thing, and everyone has an opinion on how you should perform each step of your pregnancy leading up to the wonderful day your baby is born.
Instead of worrying about how the people around you think you should share your news, put together a pregnancy milestone timeline that includes when and who you are going to tell and how.
Sharing with your support network will take the stress off of you and your partner. Communicating with your close family will set you both up with a dialogue and a plan on how to navigate those big shareable moments in pregnancy along with the quiet personal moments of pregnancy.
What Is a Pregnancy Timeline, and How to Use it to Relieve Stress?
A pregnancy timeline is simple. Most pregnancies follow a series of milestones along with a series of appointments that check on the baby’s growth and test the baby’s progress along the way. Using this natural timeline as a guide, you can prepare your own timeline as to when you would like to share your big news with your inner circle, your outer circle, and beyond!
When to Start Sharing
The best time to start sharing with your support network is first telling your parents on both sides that you have decided to try for a baby. That way, you’ll prepare both sets of grandparents, so that you can begin having important discussions about childcare and assistance after the baby arrives as well as help you may need before the baby arrives.
You may want your parents and your spouse to be with you at all your ultrasounds, but because of the current state of crisis our medical system is under, you may not be able to have someone in the office with you. Use this time as an opportunity to educate them on video calls while at the appointments.
This will ensure that you feel supported by the ones you love and won’t have to go through those essential appointments alone.
Sharing the Big Moment
During your first pregnancy, it’s hard to know when to share that you are successfully pregnant. The one thing to remember in all of this is that sharing your pregnancy journey is totally up to you. The most comfortable thing to do is a slow rollout. Not everyone in your life needs to know at the same time as those closest to you.
Creating a Pregnancy Narrative
Some parents wait till the end of their first trimester to share with their family and their close friends. The risk of miscarriage goes down significantly after the first trimester. If the couple has trouble conceiving, then waiting till this time is past may be the most helpful for the couple themselves.
Most miscarriages happen from complications beyond a mother’s control. Setting up those conversations with your support network means you will have a herd of loving arms ready to catch you if this happens to you and your partner. No one should go through these hurdles alone or blame themselves. Speak with your doctor and up your support network and know that it is okay to keep trying.
The end of the first trimester is also when you have your first prenatal visit. This is the appointment where you can hear your baby’s heartbeat for the first time. Be sure to have those you want to share this moment with briefed on how they will be involved in the appointment.
- You can choose to enjoy the appointment with just you and baby.
- You can choose to attend or Zoom with your partner or spouse.
- You can choose to Zoom with your parents and in-laws so they too can hear the baby’s heartbeat for the first time.
Whatever you decide, talk it over with those you love and want to involve that way. Everyone is ready for the big day and knows what to expect in order to play their part.
Not everyone’s fertility and journey to parenthood looks the same. There is an incredible amount of information and resources out there about infertility and just how your journey to parenthood may look.
When you decide you want to become a parent, your best form of action is to educate yourself on the possible hurdles you and your partner and family may face when heading down this route. Being aware of what to expect will help you navigate fertility and infertility as well as pregnancy and miscarriage in a healthy way.
There is nothing more important than a healthy pregnancy for both momma and baby.
When to Share with the General Public
After we get that confirmation of a healthy pregnancy, we start to get excited and are ready to start nesting. Nesting does not just include setting up the baby’s physical home but includes sharing that good news with those around you.
Everyone’s pregnancy journey is different, and you may need to assess who you will need to tell and why if you aren’t ready to just go out there and tell the world all at once.
After you let your parents know, you can begin to think of when it is best to share with others close to you based on your sharing circle.
Do you already have children? Children aren’t great at keeping secrets, so if you want to keep your pregnancy on the down-low for a little bit, you may want to wait to let your kids know.
Do you have a best friend that has been dying for you to create their kid’s best friend? Keep in mind that those outside of your family are more likely to share your news as soon as they know it, so be ready for others to see once you do share unless you can convince them into secrecy by swearing on their firstborn.
Share With Those Who Need To Know
After you have shared the essentials, it is important to share your pregnancy with those who need to know. If you and the baby’s other parent are not together, then making a plan to tell them early in the process will be healthy for you both.
If you are a working lady, you may want to tell your boss after your first-trimester appointment. This way, you can start creating a pregnancy work plan as well as a maternal leave plan. Your spouse may want to discuss paternal leave or vacation options with their employer as well.
Share With the Rest of the World
The infamous baby bump begins to show around fourteen to sixteen weeks, which will make it harder to keep your pregnancy a secret unless you work from home.
Plan your pregnancy announcement in a way that will make you and your partner or spouse feel happy and supported.
A big trend is to curate an image with your first ultrasound. This can be done with an entire photoshoot to celebrate or a simple “We’re Expecting!” post on social media.
Lots of couples incorporate themes that are important to them into their baby announcement photos. Along with your ultrasound, you can also include an organic or sustainably made onesie or outfit your child will be wearing after they are born.
You can be sure that some of your friends and family will want to begin planning your baby showers following your announcement. Like bridal or wedding showers, it is okay to have these planned by multiple people in your life as we have many different groups that may not cross over. There is also a rather new trend to gift the expecting mother a gift she can use for herself or the baby in the first few months of pregnancy before the baby shower date.
In this day and age, expecting parents are getting creative about hosting baby showers. You might be hosting a full, in-person shower, or reaching out to friends and family all around the world in a virtual baby shower—it’s all about what’s best for you.
The Stork Is On Its Way
No matter what advice you receive from those around you, remember that this is your pregnancy and whether it is your first or your seventh, you get to share your news with those you love and those you barely know whenever it feels right for you.
Creating that pregnancy timeline plan can help take the guesswork and the stress out of sharing the news of your new bundle of joy. Less stress means a happy momma and a happy baby.
In conclusion, every pregnancy is different, and the milestones and moments that we get to experience along the way are ours to share exactly when and how we want to.